Who Have You Blessed Recently? Changing The World One Act of Kindness At A Time

I'm a big fan of communities, particularly technical communities, because I have benefitted a lot from them when I was starting out in the IT industry. I remember the time I used to spend on BBS and IRC channels when I was "forced" to learn computer programming. If not for the generosity and kindness of these people who I have never even seen in my life, I would not have even pursued this career. I remember people like my father-in-law who, as a professional doctor, gave selflessly to others by offering his services for free.

So, everytime people ask me why I do technical community work - write technical articles, speak at conferences and user group meetings, mentor and teach people online - I speak about the experiences I have had with the generous people who have blessed me with what they have. And I am simply just giving back what I have received. A few days ago, someone approached me regarding coaching/mentoring services I provide. While I may be tempted to take it due to the financial challenges I currently have, he started telling me about him being unemployed for a few months now having been retrenched from his previous company. He needs to update his skills so he can start looking for a new job. That got me thinking - how can I be strategic in my approach while, at the same time, be able to help him get back on his feet? I started out by giving him encouragement and telling him my own stories on how I got to where I am now. The goal is to condition him to what I call the "successful mindset." Then, I laid out a strategic approach on how I intend to help him help himself. The important thing is to get started.

In the process of doing this, I realized that it helped cultivate the "generous mindset" within me; that I no longer look at my limitations but rather look at opportunities to help other people despite of my need. In today's economy, we often see our lack rather than what we have that can help improve the lives of other people. What we don't realize is that we have something within us much greater than what we think we have. In this particular case, I have the skillset to help someone else get up-to-speed on a new career. It may not be profitable for me in the short-term but experience has taught me the "business value" of generosity and how it pays off in the long run. And when people ask how they can pay me back, my response has always been the same - find somebody who needs something that you have and offer to do the same thing (the freedom to define what business is and what isn't is still my prerogative). I just get a kick out of having that opportunity to be a blessing to someone else.

So, who have you blessed recently? I see it as changing the world one act of kindness at a time

I’ve been tagged – Three Things That Got Me Here

I have been out of my non-tech blogosphere for quite some time as my current job is taking a lot out of me. Still, I manage to keep my Twitter account updated which, for me, is like my tiny version of this blog. With all of the changes that happened to me in the past year, there is more than a story worth telling.

I received an email a few days ago about SQL Server Expert Kevin Kline (blog / Twitter) tagging me, prompting me to write my version of "Three Things That Got Me Here." Well, here it is. Much of who and where I am now is a by-product of my faith (I took this from Kevin Kline ...it is so not original) which I got introduced to as an 8-year-old. Having grown up almost inside a church and almost being mistaken as a pastor's kid has advantages but what really got me kicking was my friendship with my "then" youth pastor who shed light to what I now consider my favourite Bible verse. That has radically changed my life journey from being his assistant on campus ministries to planting churches and eventually being where I am now. And though we're literally thousands of miles apart (Philippines and Canada are on different sides of the globe), the spiritual bond keeps us close.

So, on with the story...

Tagged as nuisance

One thing that I have learned as a parent is that kids pick things up really quick so it is very important to really be careful about what we say or do in front of our or other kids. At 4 years old, I heard a colleague of my mom commented about me saying, "you better be prepared to have bail money 'coz this kid's gonna be in and out of jail when he grows up." That sunk in deep. Right there and then I told myself to never let any negative thing, comment or thought define who I am. The fact is - "it's not who we are, it's who God is." Every time I hear a negative comment made towards me, I use that as a fuel to ignite a passion to counteract what they have just said and accomplish what they thought I couldn't. There are countless of instances where that has been challeneged - from being turned down by IBM, Microsoft and then-Andersen-Consulting-turned-Accenture because my university transcript was not good enough for them, to hearing a manager commenting on my professional goals and asking another colleague if I can really achieve them. Each one of them became an inspiration to achieve more, strive harder and look beyond what they see. It takes looking through your mind's eye to achieve greater heights and go past our limitations to see what we are destined to be - and eventually achieve it. Looking back, I was thankful for that remark made when I was a kid and the numerous times I was rejected, ridiculed, underestimated and forgotten. It takes a different perspective to take all of them. Besides, I would never be able to enjoy playing the piano (although I've been recently known as bassplayer) if I wasn't told that I couldn't play any rough sport.

To see is to believe...but to experience is even better

I was born and raised in the city (Manila happens to be the Philippine's capital and, I just found out recently, that I went to the same university in Manila as the SQL Ninja Dona Santos did) and any city kid knew better. We were not a well-off family but my mom made sure that we went to private school and have our basic needs met (let me just say I was a "deprived" city kid). So, while my brothers enjoyed vacation in the city, as a 5-year-old, I opted to spend mine in the farm - helping my grandparents till the soil, sell tomatoes on a hot, humid, summer afternoon, take the carabao for a dip in the river and do stuff that a typical city kid wouldn't even imagine doing on his vacation. My mom thought that I was just enjoying my vacation but, the reality is, I was opening my eyes to what hard work really means and what the lives of people we don't see everyday really are about. It's ironic because it was when I have learned to properly use the spoon and fork (who would eat with their bare hands after coming back from the farm with hands all filthy?). It made me appreciate the amount of work that the farmers do in order to produce food from the ground, the happiness they enjoy despite not having a large LCD TV with an XBox console in the living room (some of them don't even have shoes on their feet nor clean water to drink) and what Dr. Stephen Covey made known as the "Law of the Farm."

When I was in my sophomore year in high school, I wanted to do summer jobs. But it is against the law to hire somebody who is way below 18. And, so I went thru some of my mom's contacts to have me work for a large air conditioner manufacturing plant, doing assemblies of blower fans. And while I can be considered as an illegal worker due to my age, we never did go thru the process of defining liability from the employer's perspective since they are a close relative. Still, the risk of getting pinned down by a lathe machine or bruised by a metal part getting assembled is there. I worked from 7AM until midnight from Monday to Friday and never had to go home without a bruise or a clean shirt (and did I mention not wearing any protective gear at all?). Throughout that experience, I have seen the hardships of the common laborer who work so hard just to pay off their debt and how most of them work away from their homes, living in shanties just so they can earn a decent wage to send back to their families. It's also an early course in what I termed "selfish capitalism" where stakeholders enjoy the fruits of their laborers' hard work while ignoring the plea of the commons (I guess this is a totally separate blog post altogether). It has taught me to always treat people fairly, even beyond what they expect. Which is why every time I engage in a project where I needed to hire people, I always make sure that I treat them well as long as I can. And while I ended up taking a mechanical engineering degree in the university because of the exposure to that job, I never did get a chance to be one. But the lessons learned from those experiences were well worth it that they still make good stories to tell my kids or whenever appropriate when I speak at conferences.

Risk...Believe...Trust

I was a risk taker even as a kid, as the previous stories have already highlighted. I guess most people aren't as tolerant to risks as I am. As I grew up, it played a major role in shaping both my professional and personal life. And while I have learned about calculated risks and how taking risks need to be a process requiring a lot of analysis, I still believe that the difference between good leaders and great leaders is their intuition, as Dr. John C. Maxwell highlighted in his book The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership. I took risks even when its was totally illogical. And, again, people will laugh, scorn or ridicule you because it doesn't make sense to them. But I felt that I needed to do them one way or another. One of those risks was starting my own company. My parents didn't like the idea because they were both employed and have been in formal employment all their lives. I never had any employment experience aside from that summer job I took when I was in high school. I thought it was the only thing to do since nobody wanted to hire me after graduation (see first story). And so I did. I did consulting work for government institutions and small businesses - ranging from fixing computers, managing their network and messaging infrastructure to building their portal. While it wasn't an easy job, it helped me learn more about businesses and how the "employment" mindset has been keeping people from taking risks. During these times, I hated computer programming. I remember asking my best friend to write my programming project in Pascal because I couldn't write a single line of code. I have had to take the programming course twice in order to graduate, an implicit way of saying I failed the course the first time I took it. But, then, a customer was referred to me asking me to write a simple inventory/point-of-sale application for their business. I declined the request as I told them explicitly that I don't write programs. They insist that they want me to write the application for them because they trust me and that they are willing to pay any reasonable amount as long as I personally write it for them. I took that as both a challenge and a sign of utmost trust (Business Lesson: If your customers are betting their stakes on you, it is your responsibility to deliver no matter what). I did everything I can to start learning how to write code, learning Visual Basic 4 with Data Access Object, spending about 12-16 hours a day on BBS and chatrooms asking questions about how things work and how to create an application. It's actually my first exposure to the power of the community and that I promised myself to return the favor by being actively engaged in the community, giving back what I have been given. The experience provided me with lessons both in customer relationship and technical competence. What I felt about writing computer programs has totally changed and I ended writing even more applications from smart clients to web applications on the Microsoft platform. And while I am no longer a developer (I quit having the fear of losing more hair should I continue), the skills I have learned from being one has helped be become a better IT professional. Had I not taken that risk, who knows if I have ever been to where I am now. And while others may say "find what you love to do and do it" in order to be successful, I found myself "loving what I do and doing it with excellence."

Public speaking is not for everybody and I guess that includes me - well, almost a decade ago. I still get people laughing every time I tell them that I am a bit shy and introvert especially when they've seen me do presentations in conferences and seminars (my former classmates at the MBA program proved I was somehow right). I'm a big fan of my brother who has a knack for getting along with people and speaking in front of a crowd. But I knew I had a passion for teaching, even though my personality wasn't really aligned with it. And, so I started applying for a teaching job in a local institution well known for their technical expertise. One advise I have received in the process from a very good friend was that "teaching doesn't even put food in your table." And while that proved to be a fact, it was a risk I was willing to take with my family, barely making both ends meet in the process. I am just happy to know that my wife was willing to take that risk with me. The teaching experience became my platform to improve my delivery skills, interacting with people and learning the difference between the average and the excellent teacher. And that had paved the way for me to have the opportunity to earn my MCT certification that eventually landed me job offer to move to Singapore from the Philippines. That is a whole different risk in itself. Having to stop school, leave the second company that my business partners and I started, with no friends and family to be with and move to Singapore in 2005 was no small feat. I remember another friend who told me how crazy I was to accept the job offer that was about to make just more than half of what she was making back in 2000, not to mention the cost of living in Singapore with 2 toddlers and being the only one working in the family. I just felt peace in my heart when I have finally decided to go, ignoring all the risks that were before me and simply learning truly what the word "trust" means. Looking back, I was just happy to shun all the fear within me and took all those risks, realizing that the only way to see a miracle is by simply taking risks (while Jesus had to feed the five thousand with five loaves of bread and two fishes, we have US$200 in the pocket with two adults and two toddlers and no place to go in Singapore). Besides, of the twelve disciples that Jesus had, only Peter had the experience of walking on water.

It's been a year and 2 months since we moved here in Canada and that move is yet another showcase of how risk taking got me to where I am now. We are still taking risks and probably until we see our kids take their own risks and grow with the experience. But in all of these risk taking and believing lie the secret to where I am now - it is in trusting that "the people who know their God shall be strong and carry out great exploits."

Special thanks to Kevin Kline for prompting me to write this post. I guess it's about time to write individual blog posts about my Twitter updates

P.S. I still would like to emphasize that I am by no means a preacher nor a pastor as some would like to say. But there is something about the things around us that declare the goodness of our Creator in their own unique ways that one can't simply ignore

Connecting Always Requires Energy

Chapter 4 of Dr. John Maxwell's new book, Everyone Communicates, Few Connect is now available on his blog. Catch it before it's too late. After reading thru the chapter, I've posted this comment on the blog.

They Get Out Of It What You Put In

It was my very first time to do a presentation for a group of IT professionals in Ottawa, Canada and I have decided to apply what I have learned from the previous presentations I did - PowerPoint slides were well thought out taking me at least 3 weeks to complete, writing a thorough story line as part of the delivery, and incorporating all of that to drive home the message. Add to that the methodology and delivery - burning with passion and excitement that the audience was always anticipating what I'm about to say. After the presentation, one person approached me and said, "I think you have raised the bar for delivering technical presentations." Not only did they learn so much from the presentation but they have appreciated the effort that went into it. One presenter even attempted to imitate what I have done and commented that he now understands the amount of work needed to come up with a great presentation. From preparation to delivery to evaluation - it takes a tremendous amount of energy.

Connecting Requires Selflessness . . . Give

A common pitfall for every speaker and presenter is the "know it all" attitude who feels that what he has to say is of utmost importance and that everybody should listen. I also fall prey into that - I guess we all do. What's worse is that I see a lot of presenters simply do it to get recognized, be admired and feed off the ego that he knows a lot better than anybody else.

I was reminded of having the attitude of giving and humility whenever doing presentations or conducting a speech. The audience will really feel the sincerity and will shift into "receiving mode," willing to accept whatever the speaker has to give. The goal is always to "put the audience first." That in itself is a sign of humility.

Connecting Goes Beyond Words

I have been out of the blogosphere for quite some time due to a lot of work but I guess my Twitter updates have complemented the lack of blog posts. I'm thankful I did Twitter two months ago

Since I have been following Dr. John Maxwell on Twitter, I saw this post about the new book he's working on entitled Everyone Communicates, Few Connect. The chapters are being offered on his blog for a few days and then taken down being replaced with a summary of the chapter. I'm just not checking on my Twitter and blog regularly that I missed the first two chapters. At least I managed to catch the third chapter. I've posted a comment on the blog and it's what the content of this blog post is all about.

"This is my first encounter with the chapters for the book and all I can say is that this has hit a home run. Having been invited to do technical presentations for Microsoft technologies both locally and globally, I know what it means to sit in a presentation with boring PowerPoint slides, bullet points that can kill and listen to a speaker that probably memorized the transcript of the presentation. I have been guilty of doing this myself as I initially thought that this was the way to do technical presentations. Ever since I have learned about the art of delivering presentations, I have committed myself to continuous development on the subject – from creating great PowerPoint slides to delivering the presentation (special mention to great books like Presentation Zen by Garr Reynolds, slide:ology by Nancy Duarte and Working the Room by Nick Morgan).

From experience, I have learned that enthusiasm, emotional and visual connection when delivering a presentation is what makes people want to stay and listen more – even for a highly technical and boring presentation. The reason I get invited to do presentations was not because of the level of content I provide other (other speakers are smarter and have more technical knowledge than I do) but because I was able to connect to the audience, understand what they feel and provide a solution using the technologies I am presenting. It’s hard to be an expert in just one aspect of technology especially when it keeps evolving and this is what I have learned when delivering presentations. It’s hard to be an expert at what you will present on. But what makes you as one when you deliver your presentation is the passion and enthusiasm that come with it during the preparation and delivery. Anybody can deliver presentations on just about any topic they may or may not be expert on. The only difference in making it an effective one is to put yourself in the listener’s shoes, feel what they feel and develop and deliver a presentation based on that.

Bottom line:It’s all about the listener when we communicate."

If It Aint Broken, Don't Fix It. But If It Is...

A common expression in IT is "if it ain't broken, don't fix it" as it is important to keep a consistent experience in the infrastructure - staff get's to send emails on time, they get to access their sales documents on the portal, etc. But what if it is broken? We fix it. The mail server went down, we get a severity one alert to "immediately" resolve the issue together with an email from the CEO saying email is of primary importance in the organization.

I wonder why so many organizations don't do so. They see a business process that doesn't work, a work environment that does not foster creativity, or a marketing campaign that does not bring results - they're just simply broken. Yet management still expects to see better results. W.L. Bateman highlights this in a very popular quote, "If you keep on doing what you've always done, you'll keep on getting what you've always got." If it's broken, you've just got to fix it

I saw this video of Seth Godin's presentation at Gel 2006 which somehow highlights what this means.

Why Likeability Affects Service Delivery

Tim Sanders in his book The Likeability Factor emphasizes the need to improve one's likeability in order to be successful. He cited several studies that prove how likeability affects your job, the judge's decision in a court hearing and what not. What's fascinating is that we see this in action in just about any interaction we engage in or see every day. How many times have you screamed at a clerk in a store because of a defective product only to see other complaining customers get serviced ahead of you? Likeability kicks in and you just blew it.

Having to deal with customers as part of my job, I sometimes get tempted to deal with them based on likeability. One incident occurred when an arrogant customer was requesting for an issue to be resolved immediately. Sure, we all wanted to keep customers happy to make them stay. But likeability proved to be right when I have assigned the task to somebody else instead of me doing it. Not because I can't do it but simply because it would be counterproductive doing the work to solve the issue while at the same time having to deal with an arrogant customer.

Now there are two ways to deal with this (especially if they are your customers) but I doubt most people will chose both. One is to stay away from people whose likeability just hits the floor so as not to be affected by it. The other is to make them happy while pinpointing their character flaw. There's always a nice way to say something not nice. It's risky to do the latter especially when you try to keep business as purely business. But it does have some benefits. Having the customer realize that you are concerned with their overall welfare and not just their money as part of the business will make them long-time, committed customers. The choice is totally up to you to make.

Making Social Networking Work

While I am not an avid fan of social networking, its a fact that even businesses use it for their advantage - hiring people, getting potential business contacts, marketing, etc. Many people just use it for fun while others are reaping the benefits of maximizing their use. Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn to name a few of these social networking sites have become popular due to increased usage. In fact, even Pizza Hut hired a "Twintern" to promote their brand to their Twitter followers. While it has become a hype, making it work for you requires a lot of work. An article in NetworkWorld highlights 10 keys for making social networking work for your advantage. One thing I learned thoughout my experience with people is that whatever works with them works in just about any media. Think about it. Do you remember your classmates from decades ago unless you've initiated contact with them on a regular basis? What about the very first job you had? Do the people still remember who you are? How did you know about your current job? It's all about others - not you. If you jump into the social networking bandwagon thinking you want to be connected to others, first, think about what's in it for them. I see a lot of posts on these sites promoting products and services without even reading the code of conduct on the usage of the service. A lot of people find this pretty annoying and, hence, simply ignore them. But when people find out that you are there to help them out, they bring down their barriers and are more open to what you have to offer or your need.

Bottom line - if you want social networking to work for you, remember that it is not about you